What would I tell my mid-20 yr old self?

I knew it would happen. I had such high hopes over the course of this month to post, yet I've let time get in the way. It's not that things have not been happening here. There's LOTS going on here. In trying to get into the rhythm of life, I’ve seen firsthand the power, faithfulness and provision of God not only in my own life, but in the lives of so many others in my family, and at Shoreline.

God has been so faithful to bring some precious mid-20 something young women into my life over these 4 weeks. As we have talked about where they are with Christ, what God is doing in their lives, what they believe the future looks like, they’ve come looking for encouragement, hope, and prayer.

As I began to pray and think about each one, God so gently reminded me of what a mess I was in my mid-20s. And yes even 30s. And maybe even today at ….well, age doesn’t matter. I began to think about how different my life would have been if I had taken a different approach to it. Sure, God met me with each trial and mountain of my life, but if I could give insight to my then 20something self from where I sit now…. Well, here’s what I’d share.
Thus, today’s post.

1.      Your value doesn’t come by doing more things.

I admit, I was a work-a-holic in my 20s and some in my 30s. I had spent my entire life proving that I could be the best, be on top, and was the most responsible employee, friend, daughter, and sister that anyone could find.

It wasn’t until the mid-life crash of 35 where I finally learned what God had been teaching me my entire life. God isn’t so concerned in all the things I think He wants me to do, but in WHO he wants me to be.

2.      Healthy relationships are key.

From friendships to family, to romantic relationships, you will end up at a dead end if you have co-dependent, unhealthy relationships. With the help of wise counsel, learn to begin to create healthy boundaries in every area of your life. Because of the nature of us women to overcommit, manipulate, and force relationships- often those that are not good for us, not one of those relationships where I did that DO NOT existence today. (thank the Lord for his great mercy on that!)

Because 20somethings crave community, the enemy often can and will twist things in your life to make you think you have to be all things to all people. YOU SIMPLY CAN NOT.

3.      Family- your blood family –is important.

Because I had such good friends in my 20s/30s, it was often easier to create family with those with whom I lived, worked, and did life with on a consistent basis. It was easier too. We all liked the same things and got along. However, I didn’t want to engage my blood family much because of the dysfunction that I knew I would have to address. Sure, I went to see them. But when I was with them, I was emotionally absent. Know this- every family has some kind of dysfunction. Don’t let the mess of your family keep you from figuring out how to serve them the best you know how and can.

4.      Margin in your life is a necessity.

Sure, there is something to do every single night of the week with friends you love and like. Community awaits you. However, when is the last time you were able to be still? The last time you allowed God to speak His promises over your life among the noise, drama, and chaos of what your Ipad, Iphone and other forms of I-ness bring you? Create space in your life DAILY to be still, to listen, and allow God to have room in your life and heart to communicate his promises of love to you. Sure, you are busy. But you can’t afford not to. Get into God’s word and let it get into you.

5.      Find someone to speak into your life consistently.

Whether that’s a mentor, or older, wise sage, find someone who loves you, but isn’t impressed with you. Do some seeking and find someone who makes you curious of why they do what they do, how they parent their children, how they memorize scripture, how they do marriage and life. Learn all from them you can. Ask questions. Find out what they are reading. Consistently meet with them ON PURPOSE for them to speak truth into your life and give them permission to see things and point them out that you do not see.

6.      Don’t waver.

Interpretation: BELIEVE GOD.

His word is true, faithful, and the Lord can be counted on. God is who He says He is and He will do what He says He will do.

“Do not waver with unbelief regarding the promises of God, but be strengthened in your faith &give glory to God, being fully persuaded that God has the power to do what He has promised.” Romans 4:20-22

For the word of the LORD holds true, and we can trust everything he does. Psalm 33

What would you truths would you now tell your 20something self if you could?